Rob Does Words
Treating fiction poorly since 2019

16 November 2023


The only movement was the flickering, slightly yellowish, florescent light that hung in the lobby just outside the fishbowl window. There was no one in the lobby.

The lobby was the last thing before you went through a set of sealed doors, only openable by a button behind the fishbowl windows. Through there were The Doctors.

Behind the fishbowl windows three people sat. One of them, the only man in that room, had his feet up on his desk and a mens magazine across his face. He wasnt asleep, but he was good at pretending he was.

Directly across from him a woman in her mid to late 20s sat, trying to type things on her computer without much success.

In the far corner, an older woman, maybe heading into her 40s was cleaning up the small kitchenette they had been supplied with.

There was a door off to the side emblazoned with the usual logos and the letters OIC in block capitals stencilled onto the frosted window. The flickering of a shadow the only indication that someone was in there.

All in all, it was another ordinary day.

“Are you just going to sit there and read your gross magazine all day?” the younger of the women asked.

Her name was Selene and her frustration was more to do with him than any of the work she couldnt do. Her hair was a coppery red and she wore it in a messy bun. She tugged at a strand that had fallen from behind her ear and tucked it back. She wore her uniform as properly as the regulations stated, everything was freshly washed and freshly pressed. She would sacrifice an hours sleep to ensure she looked as she was meant to even if no one every inspected her.

The other woman, Clem, glanced over from where she was cleaning and then towards the closed door. If these two started up again, the lieutenant would be out here in an instant and then it would be everyones problem.

“Its not gross,” the man said, not moving. “Its educational.”

“Its porn,” Selene said. “The cover is actually two women-”

“Cut it out you two,” Clem said. She was almost the opposite of Selene. Her hair was out, wavy and almost with a life of its own as she moved around. A mousey brown, tinged with highlights, it was usually the first thing people noticed about her, but it wasnt for long. She spent more time at the gym than she did at her job, ensuring that she kept to the physical fitness requirements of enlistment – something the other two people in this room did not – and it showed. She stood a few inches taller than both of the younger people and used this, along with her well toned physique to physically intimidate people. Of course, it didnt work on these two anymore, since behind all that physicalness, she was a soft touch. She could not bear actual conflict and would usually be the first to give in when pressure was applied.

“He literally has a porn magazine over his face,” Selene argued.

“Youve seen me with worse on my face,” the man said. But he removed the magazine and filed it in his desk.

“Gross,” Clem muttered and moved on to another section of the office to clean.

Selene blushed a smidge and frowned hard at the man to hide it. “I still think its deliberate, the way you always end up like that in front of me.”

“I would never,” he replied, giving her that smirk she hated, but couldnt help but enjoy. “I respect your prudishness and would never try to sully that with depravity. Youre one of my oldest and dearest friends. Imagine what that says about me.”

There was a pause as what he said made it through all the filters in both womens heads. Clem was the first – she usually was – to crack and she snorted with laughter as she tried her hardest not to.

“Ligh,” she said after coughing. “You are the worst person on board this ship.”

“Incorrect,” the man, Ligh, said. “The worst person is the one who deemed it necessary for me to go to fucking therapy.”

As one, both Selene and Clem checked the clock. They both sighed in frustration. That was the reason he put the magazine away; not through any sort of modesty, but because he had to leave.

“Dont miss me too much,” he winked at Selene and gave Clem a slap on her ass that echoed in the small room they all shared.

“Ligh!” both women called, but to no avail. He had already slipped out the door and into the lobby.


Ligh Collins, yes, that was his name, enlisted in the army soon after the alien ship landed on Earth. He had never considered military service as an option before that day, but everything about his life before then was boring and unsatisfying.

As he, like everyone else, watched the strange ship land and all the drama that surrounded it, he knew that he needed to leave. To go to wherever that ship came from. He also, rightly, assumed that the best place for that idea to come true was the military.

Five years, and only one almost court martial, later, here he was, scratching that wanderlust itch in the depths of space.

The only problem was he, and the rest of the humans aboard the ship they were on, were essentially hostages. They were lost in deep space, unable to contact Earth, and couldnt do a thing about it.

“Still, though,” he had said more than once. “This is better than working at a McDonalds.”


There had been a time when Ligh would never have considered therapy as a genuine option to help with whatever issues he had. Not that he would ever admit he had any.

Now, though, having had several sessions with the ships psychologist, he was warming to the idea of getting whatever help he needed.

He stretched and loosened the collar of his shirt as he walked down the empty corridor towards the shrinks office.

No one sat at the reception desk outside this part of the ship. The desk itself had a few sheets of paper on it and a phone rang quietly. He ignored it all and walked straight to the door behind, which had a green panel next to it. He pressed the green and the door slid open. He stepped inside, that smile on his face again, the door slid shut and the light turned to red.


Clementine Lucy Smythe had always envisioned herself as a commander. A leader of people fighting for the peace and security of the world. Someone who was looked up to and respected and who, herself, would admire and respect those who worked under her. She had had this dream ever since she was a young girl and her father had brought a friend of his home one night, a general who told her stories of war and the struggle it was to lead so many people and make all the right decisions. She would follow in this amazing mans footsteps and carry on the legacy that he, and so many others, had forged before her.

She sat herself into a chair at the desk next to Selene after having finished cleaning and let out a long sigh. It was only 10am and she already wanted to go back to bed.

“Youre done?” Selene said without looking up from whatever it was she was doing.

“Mostly. Gotta do the lobby floors yet.”

Selene checked her watch. “Not yet,” she said.

“I know,” Clem replied. “Here they come,” she said as the doors to the doctors area slid open and four humans came out as a group, sliding across the floor effortlessly. They were all extremely attractive, dressed identically and paid absolutely no attention to the women watching them from behind their window.

“What a bunch of weirdos,” Selene said, turning her head back to her computer.

“Hot though,” Clem said.

“Clem!” another voice said and both of them turned to see their boss, the lieutenant, sticking her head from behind her office door into the room. “Got a second?”

“Sure, boss,” Clem said and stood.

“Careful this doesnt cut into your gym time,” Selene smirked at her.

“Its ok,” Clem said. “Im already planning on not coming in tomorrow, just like whatsisname today.”

Clem ducked into the office and closed the door behind her. Already seated back behind the desk, their boss, Lieutenant Caroline Beaumont, was eagerly waiting for her.

Caroline was a bit younger than Clem, having started her military career as a commissioned officer. She had messy blonde hair, looking perpetually as if she had just got out of bed. Her blue eyes almost seemed to shine and her smile was the reason why certain people made excuses to come down to this almost abandoned part of the ship.

“Ma’am,” Clem said, sitting before her.

“God, dont start that shit again,” Caroline said. “No one is in here except you and me. Caroline or even Caro is fine.”

“I dont want to sound like Ligh,” Clem said.

“Speaking of,” Caroline said, almost shyly, “what do you think of this?” she turned her computer screen and on it was a rather extravagant and incredibly inappropriate piece of sleepwear.

“What the fuck,” was all Clem could say.

“A bit much?” Caroline asked, genuinely unsure. “One of our benefactors, down in the engine section is able to make us clothing. I was wondering if you think Ligh would like this?”

“You want to wear that for him?”

“You cant say he isnt attractive,” Caroline said, blushing. “And he seems,” she paused for a moment. “Friendly.”

“Hes a pest,” Clem said. “He would sleep with anyone who looked at him the right way.”

“Works for me, then,” Caroline said.


Ligh sighed happily, his hand resting behind his head. His eyes were closed and for a moment, he felt truly satisfied.

“Perhaps therapy was the best move for you,” the psychologist said, laying next to him, her naked body still grinding slowly against his.